A student was lucky to find a decent accommodation with a cheap rent. His colleagues came to visit him and he was showing them the house.
"This is the kitchen. This is the bedroom. And this one is the living room ... "
"And what are this hammer and this pot that are hanging on the wall for? What are you going to do with them?" one of his colleagues asked.
"This is a talking clock."
"I have never seen a clock like that. Can you show me how it works?"
"Sure. Look," the student said.
He took the hammer and struck at the pot with all his strength. Then a voice was heard from the other side,
"What you are doing? Are you crazy? It is half past one in the night, you idiot!"

    A student entered the refectory, but there all places were taken. He took a seat at a table where a professor was having a meal. Scowling, the professor said, “ A pig and an eagle don't sit at the table together!”
The student replied, “Okay. Then I fly off ...”
The professor got angry and decided to fail the student’s exam. However, on the examination the student responded perfectly to all questions.
“Okay, I'll ask you the last question. Imagine you walk down the street and see two bags - one with money and other with mind. Which would you choose?”
“That with the money!”
“I'd choose the one with mind ...”
“Of course! Who what has not that he chooses...”
The professor became angrier. He took the student’s report and wrote in it “idiot”. The student, without looking at it, take it and left the room. After a minute the student opened the door again and said,
“Mr. Professor, look here, you signed my report, but you forgot to record my grade.”

    An examination. A student responded perfectly to all questions. However, the professor decided to nag him and asked, “The last question. How many lamps are there in the room?”
“20,” replied the student.
“You’re wrong. They’re 21. I carry a flash-light in my pocket.”
The student had to resit. The professor asked again, “How many lamps are there in the room?”
“21!” replied the student.
“No. They’re 20. I did not bring my flashlight.”
“Yes, but this time I brought mine,” replied the student.