Every day a farmer brought to the dairy about two hundred litres of highest-quality milk. The people couldn’t help wondering how he produced it as he had just five cows. Finally, one of them asked him directly what the trick was.
"It’s simple," the farmer answered. "Every morning, when I go into the stall, I shout, "Well, well, girls, what shall we sell today – milk or beef?""

    A redneck was fishing by the lake near his house. Suddenly, he caught the Golden Fish. The Fish said to him,
"Please, redneck, do not kill me! I’ll make three of your wishes come true."
The redneck hit the fish on the ground with all his strength and shouted,
"Whom do you call a redneck, you stupid fish?!"

    A shepherd was pasturing his flock on the grazing land when he saw a luxury Renault passing on the road. Suddenly the car damaged and stopped. A French woman went out of the car. The shepherd came to help her and after a while he managed fixing the car. Happy, the French woman decided to thank him and made sex with him. Well, but she liked sex a lot and said to the shepherd, “Come with me in Paris and you’ll see what wonderful life is waiting for you!”
“Oh, girl, where I’ll go. Look here ...my sheep, the flock ...”
“Come with me. I have many girl friends. They will be very happy with you.”
“No-no. If you want, take my brother?”
“Your brother? What about your brother? Is he such a good lover as you?”
“I don’t know! But last year he made sex with one bear.”
“And?”
“And the bear still brinks him honey.”